Words that come to mind from Lacey Schwart’s story: Inspiring, fearless, unapologetic. Great film that has universal truths that would appeal to a wide audience. Thank you Lacey for willing to be transparent and sharing your story. Support this indie doc – it is a good one!
If you know a bit about me and my story, from those three words, you will know Lacey Schwartz is my kind of person. I watched this film last night at Laemmle Theatre in Beverly Hills. Lacey Schwartz, happened to be born into a Jewish Family to a parents that she thought were both of European descent and she was raised under the safety net of being “white.”
As a black woman watching this film I went through a range of thoughts and in a Maury Povich world of “you are not the father,” at some point the reality was this was a story about a woman that lies to two men, lies to her family, and allows a man that is not the father raise a child that is not his until the truth rears it’s ugly head and the offspring has to face the unfortunate reality of her blackness and what that means in American Society. Lacey allowed a camera into her life, as she discovered who she really was. Most people do not know who they are beyond the constructs of the family they were born into, or the religion they grew up with, or social queues and defining based on societal beliefs. Lacey in her experience had to challenge all of those ideas and she did it in front of a camera fearlessly in an unapologetic way. Well done Lacey!
If you are not familiar with my blog – commentary can run long, because I am raw and truthful in my thoughts – so here is the full range of my thoughts as the film continued to unfold. The lie Lacey had been told all of her life was that her father had a Sicilian grandfather that she took after. For a good portion of the film, it was plausible, and like the film “Skin” white people do have African ancestry that from time to time will allow recessive genes to manifest in a fair skinned child with African features, and I think by enlarge they are ill prepared with how to manage that situation when it happens. Although this was not the truth, it was interesting that as her parents truth – neither one of them had the courage to empower this child that was going to go to public school, or explained to her what it meant in this society which is she would be viewed as a black girl. In a way their denial left a young Lacey unprepared for this world which at times is unkind. I also thought it was interesting that she considered herself white, because some white people do not consider Jewish people to be white – but the reality is anyone in a white skin, regardless of religious beliefs, gets to be white and afforded the privilege that comes with.
I also thought black people, particularly African Americans have stories of Native American heritage, Irish heritage, French heritage or some other European heritage in our family history. Many of us have an uncle, grand parent or great aunt that looks white. We are not allowed to explore our whiteness because to the outside world, the blackness of our skin does not give us permission to have a white experience outside of family gatherings where the reality is what it is.
As the story continued to unfold, I truly felt for Lacey and her father because her mom’s “Little White Lie” had major repercussions. The “Little White Lie” took choice away from her “Daddy,” and although I do not believe in sin in the Christian sense – this is one of the greatest sins a person can commit against another human being. Lacey considers her family broken and she thought she could fix it, but her dad will have to go through his own journey of forgiveness. Back in 1968 or 1977 he may have had the capacity to love her mom, in spite of the truth, but his hurt at this point runs too deeply. As far as her biological father – it was interesting to me that she thought there would or should be a connection with him, beyond accepting the physical features that Lacey inherited, this man did not raise her or claim her, there was no way for there to be a real connection with him, and certainly none comparable to the affinity that her dad clearly has for her.
Side bar – with an audience of 15-20 people, I would expect all audience questions could be answered. Because of Lacey being raised Jewish audience was predominantly Jewish – and I did feel like moderator skipped over my hand being raised for a question as if my presence made her uncomfortable and she like Lacey is biracial and Jewish – so I left. Now me and my two friends were the only black folks in the room, and the moderator if I understood her introduction correctly works for Be/chol Lashon which advocates for diversity – they need to get whatever that was together to make sure commentary is heard from everybody where possible. That on a personal note was ridiculous. So my question/ commentary never happened – but I was able to pick my daughter up on time so 10 good mommy points for me… and I have a blog so 5 bonus points for me, lol.
Unapologetically,
Friday Jones
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